Many of you will know that I have a day job, in which I masquerade as a mature and sensible person; indeed, a person with some degree of knowledge - as proved by the fact that I know full well that I have just used an example of litotes (which, by the way, is an excellent made-up illness to ring in sick with, along with my other favourite, stichomythia; as in "I'm sorry, I can't come in today. I have a nasty case of litotes and I fear my partner may have stichomythia." NB, this will not work if you are employed in an English department.)
So anyway, I spend my days talking about modal verbs, syndetic listing and deictic references; sometimes, I even spend my evenings reading worthy fiction by proper, grown-up writers (Marilynne Robinson is languishing by my bedside as we speak.) But, sometimes, I don't. January is a cold, wet, dark month (asyndetic list), and as such is an excellent opportunity to loll on the sofa (or "day bed", as Mr Liz rather sarcastically refers to it) reading a trashy book or watching lowbrow telly. To this end, I spent the weekend reading the new Karin Slaughter book (Marilynne glared venomously on as the brash newcomer ousted her from pole), and I will be spending a happy hour between 9 and 10 this evening watching Glee.
I make no apologies for this. Glee is a magnificent televisual creation, combining sly adult wit with lots of lovely shiny teenagers singing rousing show tunes; in other words, exactly what you need after a day spent with English teens who show little or no inclination for bursting into song or mastering even a simple dance routine during class. As everyone must surely know by now, the ones to watch are Sue Sylvester, a woman of such track-suited magnitude that non-PE teachers across the country are hurriedly investigating whether it's too late to change specialism; Kurt, whose blossoming relationship with his initially homophobic father must have brought a tear to even the hardest of hearts; and Brittany. Brittany is far and away the best character in Glee; she is sweet, she is sluttish, and she is stupid, a girl who has slept with everyone in school and is under the impression that dolphins are just gay sharks. Look, I didn't say she was a role model.
So I WILL be watching tonight, desperately hoping that the rumours I've heard about series two using more "contemporary" music are unfounded; I WILL be excited about the Britney Spears episode; and I WILL still be hoping for an unlikely romance between Kurt and Mercedes. But I would like to stress that any gossip you've heard about Mr Liz giving me a Glee CD for Christmas that I have listened to repeatedly is cruel and, erm, completely untrue; I'm FAR too busy reading this Marilynne Robinson book.....