Tragedy for the Residents of South Manchester

A deathly silence descended upon South Manchester this week as the shock news emerged that Mr Khandoker is closing his restaurant for refurbishment for 6 weeks. The popular local curry house, "recommended by celebrities", will shut its doors from Monday 4th Feb until Monday 17th March to allow for a complete overhaul and extension of existing facilities. One Didsbury resident, too upset to be named, commented: "Its an emotional time. Obviously as a community we must come together to survive this tragedy and start to rebuild our lives." Locals were provided slight comfort by the news that the takeaway Khandoker is to remain open through this dark period.

• Readers who know the identity of these mysterious Khandoker-recommending "celebrities"are invited to enlighten us all by leaving a comment.