Chicago Comes to Oldham Coliseum Theatre: Murder and Sequins Ahoy

It's an unavoidable fact of life that we all have our weaknesses. Most of mine are food or drink related - cheese, crisps and a Friday gin and tonic (or seven) all feature strongly on the list of things I am not good at saying no to - but not exclusively so: for I must also confess to a certain guilty pleasure in a musical, ideally one I know well enough to sing along to in exuberant and slightly tuneless manner whilst looking forward to a glass of pink wine at the interval. In fact, Chicago fits the bill perfectly, and as luck would have it Roxie Hart and co. arrived at Oldham Coliseum Theatre on Friday for a month-long residency of murder, high-kicking and over-sized white gloves.

You probably know the story: Roxie Hart, married to boring Amos, murders ANOTHER man, goes to prison, meets fellow murderess Velma Kelly, does some singing and dancing, appoints celebrity lawyer Billy Flynn, does some more singing and dancing, gets off, puts on small sparkly outfit, does some more singing and dancing. It's all marvellous, of course - and even more excitingly, the Oldham Coliseum Theatre production is a new and original one, the first since 1997. Whatever updates have been made, all the songs will be there - I'm already warming up for my own personal big number (All That Jazz, obviously) and am very confident I can drown out the 18-strong cast if it comes to it.

I'm going later this week, but in the meantime you can read more about it here. The production runs until Saturday 12th October, with ticket prices between £11.50 and £21 - bagsy be Velma...

The Lady Boys of Bangkok: The Glamorous Amorous Pavilion Sets up at Old Trafford, Manchester

Much to Mr Liz's eternal chagrin, he has found it exceptionally difficult over the years to get me to pass through what he considers to be the hallowed gates of Old Trafford football ground. To this day, I have been but twice - the first visit being a Sport Relief outing and the second a trip to admire some Brazilian skills during the 2012 Olympics; indeed, whilst Mr Liz stands there burbling about theatres of dreams etc etc, I am more likely to be seen high-tailing it down the road to the nearby cricket ground, or the shops and restaurants at The Lowry Centre.

He cannot perhaps be blamed, then, for demonstrating some suspicion at my sudden enthusiasm for hopping onto a tram in the next few weeks and making my way not to Damson Media City (where I would normally prefer to be going) but to Old Trafford itself. Nor do I plan to get beyond the carpark, for that is where the shimmering beauties who make up The Lady Boys of Bangkok will be pitching their marquee of delights between June 21st and July 6th for the Manchester leg of their Glamorous Amorous show. Don't be thinking this is just any old tent though - The Sabai Pavilion is a fully carpeted palace which seats nearly 400 people, with a licensed bar and a Thai restaurant in the foyer, where I fully envision myself perched at a table in the cabaret room whilst sipping on something sparkly.

The show itself looks to be frankly beyond words, promising a set list that ranges from J Lo to Whitney, via Cheryl Cole, Saturday Night Fever and - um - Gangnam Style. I've not been to see a Lady Boys show before, but general consensus amongst friends who have is that you should simply go with it - they are funny, and talented, and professional, and beautiful (sickeningly so, by all accounts - I may have to dig out a bit of make up and a sequin or two if I'm not to be hopelessly outclassed). I'm going in a couple of weeks, so expect a full report then.

And Mr Liz? He isn't coming along. I thought I might find him an uncomfortable outdoor seat with minimal leg room and leave him sitting there, in the rain, clutching an overpriced pint in a plastic glass just to really recreate the Old Trafford experience - meanwhile I'll be taking up my place at my cabaret table and ordering that first bottle of fizz in the Sabai Pavilion...

- Full details of The Lady Boys of Bangkok's Glamorous Amorous show can be found here.

Oldham Coliseum Theatre: Noel Coward's Hay Fever, Sebastian Faulks' Birdsong, and an Unfunny Girl with a Bad French Accent

Now, when I started this blog some two hundred years ago (well, nearly 6), I had no hesitation in choosing its name, no doubt imagining an all-encompassing, far-reaching, wide-ranging romp around every single last area of the city. Looking back over previous posts, however, it becomes sadly apparent that, in practice, this has not exactly been the case; indeed, an uncharitable soul might suggest, with some accuracy, that a better name for the blog might have been "Things to do in central Manchester, ideally in locations that can easily be accessed from the train station, with occasional forays to places in Didsbury that I can walk to from my house".

Thus I am ever grateful when something out of my normal radius is gently pointed out to me. I have become a convert to Royton Real Food, for example, and am now thinking of becoming most interested in another location just down the road from this monthly food paradise - Oldham Coliseum Theatre. Quite aside from the fact that this is a building full of history, dating from 1885 and the only surviving theatre from this period in Oldham, there are a couple of things coming up that I very much want to see. From tomorrow until Saturday 29th June, Noel Coward's Hay Fever is playing - forget the fact that this was written in 1924 by a fey gentleman with a penchant for a cigarette in a long holder, for this play is still funny and always will be. It's one of those country house pieces that show the British upper classes at their toe-curling best, focusing on the fairly horrific Bliss family and their treatment of their weekend guests - you may wish to make a helpful sign to hold up near the start of the performance that simply advises "RUN AWAY NOW".

And then, looking further ahead, the first week of July sees the arrival of Birdsong, adapted from one of my favourite books and recently seen on TV with the pouty-mouthed Eddie Redmayne in the starring role of Stephen Wraysford. This production trumps that particular piece of casting, however, as the touring show not only stars Sarah Jayne Dunn (meaning that Mr Liz will have something pretty to look at and will therefore be distracted from the cultural nature of proceedings) but also features Arthur Bostrom. If you are of a certain age you will already know who Arthur Bostrum is; younger readers should be advised that he will find it most amusing for you to stand up during the performance and call out witty remarks about "pissing by the door"*.

*NB The actor will NOT, in truth, find this amusing.

Full details can be found on the theatre's website. See you there - I'll be the one being physically ejected whilst still laughing uproarously at my own joke about it being a "Good Moaning"...

Abba Forever Comes to Manchester Opera House Later This Month: Local Girl Rejoices, and Sings Along, quite Loudly

I've written before about my startling capacity for over-estimating my own likely mental ability on any given evening, with a long and predictable history of booking heinously intellectual activities on week nights. Would I like to review a six-hour staging of Ibsen's more obscure works, performed backwards and entirely in Peruvian, in three weeks time? Why yes! An experimental musical evening where the works of someone I've never heard of are performed only on items found in a cutlery drawer? Please! The trouble with booking things a long time ahead is that anything seems possible; then you get to the evening in question and all you want to do is go home from work, put your pyjamas on and admire Romola Garai's tailoring in The Hour, whilst drinking tea.

Well, finally I have learnt my lesson. For on Thursday 16th May I will be casting aside my highbrow pretensions and going to see something I actually want to see: the Abba Forever tribute show rolls into town, offering a joyously uncomplicated evening of Swedish melody and exuberantly-styled hair, with singing, and dancing and - probably - an ice-cream at half time. The Abba Forever show has been running since 1998 and has a reputation for being one of the stand-out tributes to the Nordic giants, with totally live performances and a focus on tight musicianship; they also - worryingly - promise to take audiences "on a journey back to the 1970s". Hopefully this means in joy of spirit rather than by re-creating the fetching pudding bowl haircut and crocheted baby outfits I would actually have been sporting during this dubious period.

So, if you're giving the Ibsen a miss, I'll no doubt see you all at Manchester Opera House on the 16th; I want it completely understood though, that as reigning Abba Singstar champion, I shall be playing the part of Agnetha - albeit from the comfort of my chair.

- Abba Forever is at the Manchester Opera House on Thursday 16th May, and begins at 7.30. Tickets priced from £17.50 - 19.50 are available here.

Rat Pack Live, Blues Brothers Live and An Evening of Burlesque all Come to Manchester: Local Girl Casts Off Shakespeare Shackles

Sometimes, it's hard to accept that we are who we are rather than who we think we should be. Getting older of course helps with this: being advanced in years has finally gives me the confidence to admit that I don't like festivals (mud/chemical toilets/crowds), or Dickens (too long/too smug/too pompous), or certain city centre bars (queues/ridiculous prices/clientele almost exclusively young enough to be own child), amongst other things. And now, the final bastion has fallen, at last. For, despite being an English lecturer with a great love of my subject (Dickens aside, although I've tried with him, I really have), I have finally admitted to myself that when I go to the theatre I do NOT WANT to watch something worthy, or highbrow, or noble, or educational. What I actually want is to see people singing, dancing, high-kicking and generally jigging about in an ebullient manner, preferably with moments where I can myself sing along, just quietly, under my breath.

I can't begin to tell you how liberating a feeling this is. No more Chekhov on a wet Wednesday night; no more "interesting" interpretations of Shakespeare's oeuvre. Instead, I am delighted to say that I will be seeing all of these merry productions in September:

First up is Rat Pack Live at The Lowry on September 7th, an evening of big band swing featuring the music of Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and Sammy Davis Jnr. I wrote about this a couple of months ago when I was running a competition to win tickets so I won't say too much more now, other than wishing the winners of the competition a lovely time and hoping for their sake they will not be seated next to me, for the fact that I don't actually know the words to many of these songs will NOT prevent me from attempting to sing along.

Next up is The Blues Brothers - Live, also at The Lowry Theatre, on the 20th and 21st September. The original film is one of two I remember watching with my older sister when I was about 10 (the other was The Rocky Horror Picture Show); clearly, I was too young to understand either of these wasted masterpieces, but gamely pretended to know what was going on and laughed at all the bits my sister laughed at (although a beat too late to be entirely convincing, obviously). Anyway, it's 30 years since the death of John Belushi, so it's fitting that this production - the only officially licensed production of the Blues Brothers outside of America, and presented in association with both Judith Belushi and Dan Aykroyd - should hit Manchester. This particular show, a Hartshorn – Hook Production, won rave reviews at the Edinburgh Festival in 2009 and looks GOOD - I might even stand on my seat for this one*.

*Note to anyone reading this from The Lowry: I promise I will NOT stand on my seat at any point during this production.

And finally, just when my show-girl heart was fit to burst anyway, An Evening of Burlesque is coming to Manchester's Palace Theatre on Friday 21st September. Now, I'm pretty much of a newcomer to all this burlesque business (I'm fairly sure that having sat through the Cher movie of the same name and occasionally high-kicking into the kitchen to put the kettle on does not qualify one as an expert in this field), but I DID go to the Moulin Rouge earlier this month and am looking forward to seeing the UK's first (and only) touring burlesque show in the, erm, flesh, as it were. The producers promise "it’s all tease, no sleaze" *watches Mr Liz's face fall* and that there will be corsets, killer heels and stockings aplenty *watches Mr Liz brighten up again* as some of the world's most famous burlesque stars take to the stage (and me, from the comfort of my seat).

Of course, this new-found liberation won't last - I'll just make sure I enjoy it while it lasts...*goes off, can-canning just a little*

Further information on all productions can be found on The Lowry and The Palace websites.

Competition Time: Win a Pair of Tickets for Rat Pack Live at The Lowry, Salford in September 2012

One of the very nicest things about getting older is that you're allowed to like whatever music you want, without fear of recrimination. This is particularly true if you spend your daylight hours in the company of people in their late teens, who are uniformly so amazed that you can walk and talk under your own steam that they are in danger of passing out altogether should they discover that you shop at TopShop and have a passing familiarity with what I believe is known in modern youth vernacular as the Hit Parade. Even better, as in their heads you are approximately 115 years old they gape in sheer astonishment as you admire their Joy Division or Blondie t-shirt, or comment sadly on your inability to get hold of Stone Roses tickets.

However, whilst it's wholly acceptable (and indeed admirable) to cling fondly to the songs from your 80s and 90s teenage years, it is also entirely permissable to mock your long-suffering husband for listening to Old FM in the car. I have long since enjoyed this pursuit, soundly haranguing poor Mr Liz for his love of what can only be described as "music off of black and white" - until recently, that is. I have gradually come round to his love of Frank Sinatra (particularly the big New York, New York type numbers, which lend themselves so splendidly to singing along at the top of one's voice in the confines of a car, much to the delight of the person unlucky enough to be driving at the time) and Dean Martin, whose Volare simply DEMANDS to be belted out in an authentically sultry Italian style.

So it is with little reluctance that I am accompanying an excited Mr Liz to see Rat Pack Live at The Lowry on Friday 7th September - a brand new show featuring the music of Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and Sammy Davis Jr which brings the stars from the West End hit Rat Pack Live from Las Vegas to the altogether more glamorous surroundings of Rat Pack Live from, erm, Salford. You can find out more about the show here, on The Lowry website, but - even more excitingly - you can win a pair of tickets to see the show HERE. Over to the experts...

Things to do in Manchester has teamed up with the producers of the Rat Pack Live concert show to give a lucky reader the chance of winning a pair of tickets to see the spectacular production at the Lowry Theatre, Salford on Friday 7th September 2012 at 7.30pm.

It's the ultimate tribute to legendary Fifties and Sixties phenomenon the Rat Pack – Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and Sammy Davis Jnr. They were the definition of cool during their Fifties and Sixties Vegas heyday – just ask Mr Liz. Combining the full sound of big band swing with charisma, panache and swagger, the trio – collectively known as The Rat Pack – had attitude to spare.

Join the UK’s original Rat Pack concert show, featuring stars of the West End smash hit Rat Pack Live from Las Vegas:

Following his triumphant portrayal of Dean Martin in London’s West End, Mark Halliday went on to tour the USA, Europe and the UK with the famous production. Other credits include two years in the States creating the role of Hades in Disney’s new musical Hercules plus lead appearances in runaway touring hit shows Girls Night Out and Aspects of Love.

The evening’s Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jnr boast similarly impressive credentials including, respectively:
· Starring roles with the BBC Concert Orchestra, Passadena Roof Orchestra and Ronnie Scott’s Jazz Orchestra plus appearances with the likes of Sandie Shaw, Sophie Ellis Bextor and Mica Paris
· National tours portraying Sammy Davis Jnr with the West End Rat Pack and Nat King Cole in Strictly Swing.

Together the talented trio combine superbly. . .spectacularly. . . swingsationally in The Rat Pack Live. Featuring all the patter and razzamatazz of the Rat Pack’s infamous live stage show, join the UK’s number one Frank, Dean and Sammy live concert extravaganza. Prepare to experience the definition of cool…courtesy of www.easytheatres.com.

To win tickets please answer this simple question: The Rat Pack Live features tributes to Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jnr and which other famous Fifties and Sixties crooner? The first entry drawn will win a pair of tickets to the show.

Send your answer by email to manchestercomps@hotmail.co.uk with your name, address, email address and daytime phone number before the closing date of midnight on Sunday 1st July 2012. First prize will go to the first entry randomly drawn on this date. There is no cash alternative. Usual rules apply and my decision is final (I LOVE saying this).

To buy tickets contact The Lowry Box office via their website or by calling 0843 208 6000 between 9.30am and 8pm Monday to Saturday or 11am and 6pm on Sundays.

Good luck...and I'll leave you with this publicity shot of the cast, winningly entitled "New rats" - I'm off to practise my a-swinging and a-crooning.

What's On at The Lowry May - August 2010

It's that time of year again: the sun has shone for three days running, people are wearing shorts, and the new Lowry Theatre brochure is landing on doorsteps everywhere. This is always an exciting day, albeit a hideously expensive one, and this season's selection of productions is as tempting as ever.

I have caved to my inner craving for low-brow entertainment and booked tickets for, um, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat (say it quickly and it doesn't seem so bad) in July. Obviously we don't get actual Lee Meade, who is busy being famous and having babies with impartial judges; indeed, the brochure fails to specify who exactly will be donning the famous coat. I don't care; I know ALL the words to ALL the songs and am not afraid to use them.

To redress the academic balance a little I have also booked for Northern Broadsides' version of The Canterbury Tales in May. Don't be put off of Chaucer by the fact that you were forced to do it for your English Lit A-level; The Canterbury Tales is an epic work of great magnificence, by turns funny, moralising and moving, and everything touched by Northern Broadsides is brilliant - this will be witty and exuberant and will allow you to feel smug about seeing something smart that you actually enjoyed.

Finally, I have been bullied into booking to see Dirk Benedict in Columbo - this means absolutely nothing to me, but my husband's hopeful face was too much to bear and I caved. This is on in June and I have been promised ice-cream as consolation.

Other productions include Les Miserables and Evita - visit www.thelowry.com for the full programme and start saving now.